Sometimes I spend so much time making progress and then backtracking that I feel like I’m dancing instead of walking in a straight line.
So as I’d mentioned before, I’ve told my manager that I’m trans. Several of my coworkers also know… most of them in fact, by default of them being friends with me on Facebook. Today my team lead (fancy corporate talk for supervisor) asked my in front of one of my coworkers if I mided that she called my X-tina, because Christina was too much to type out most times. Before I could really say anything my coworker said “call her Tyler!” This secretly delighted my quite a bit, like the time my niece called me Aunt Tyler. They’re trying, right? I think it’s funny how the name change seems to be coming a lot easier to some people than the pronouns.
My step back? I told the team lead she didn’t have to call me Tyler when she was totally willing to.
As I’ve also mentioned before, my grandmother is the only member of my family I hadn’t officially come out to. This past weekend, Melissa and I made a trip down to see her. I talked to my sister in law before, because I suspected someone else in my family had broken the news first. My sister in law told me that, if nothing else, my youngest niece had been proudly proclaiming that she was going to wear a pretty dress for Aunt Melissa and Uncle Tyler’s wedding, so the ice had already been broken. Melissa asked me how I planned to bring it up and I told her that I knew my grandmother didn’t have a subtle bone in her body and if she suspected, she’d bring it up on her own. She did not disappoint. Her second sentence to me was “your voice is different. Are you getting sick, or are you taking testosterone?” Well, right to the point, huh? We talked about it a little. She called me “he” once, “she” a lot, but again, baby steps.
She also told me that she didn’t believe that Jesus supports my marriage and therefore she doesn’t feel like she can, in good conscience, attend my wedding. She does admit that she’s “still torn about it,” so I welcome any religiously-based arguments that “prove” (as well as any other religious text does) that she’s not going to go to Hell herself for attending my wedding.
Wedding progress: Flower girl dresses have been acquired, most of my outfit as been procured, rings have been ordered and Melissa has carved stamps…which I was not aware was a thing until recently.
And stamps have been secured…
Cake has been tasted and selected as well. I’m pretty stoked.
General life updates – there really aren’t many. I continue to be gently stuffed into management at work, despite coming out. I realize that non-discrimination policies are pretty standard in the States, but it’s nice to see that some people legitimately do not care what gender I am and just think that I’m awesome at my job. Softball season starts on April 12, which is it’s own unique sort of issue. We play in a co-ed league where men and women play with slightly different rules in the name of fairness. I’m running into the “how do I register” issues. Meh.
Annnnd last but not least, today is one month on testosterone. To be honest, I don’t feel like I’ve noticed a lot of changes yet, but Melissa says she has. My big take-aways from month one: I’ve noticed a deeping of my voice, but some people don’t hear it and others do. My 3 year old niece told me “Uncle Tyler… you sound like Chris” (her 17-year old brother). So that’s a plus, right? Little kids don’t lie about that kind of stuff. Haha. Melissa swears the hair on my arms and face is getting thicker, though not actually darkening yet. Again I don’t notice it. I did have that rampant appetite for a while, still some issues with it, but mostly I’ve kept that in check. I’m maintaining my weight at 195ish, while noticeably putting on some muscle mass. She thinks I “smell like a boy” – again I don’t notice it. I have been basically a furnace all the time. Seriously I’m always hot now. I also didn’t almost pass out giving myself my shot this morning!! I’m not having the injection-site reaction I had with the first 2 shots either, or the bruising. *knock on wood*. And, not that any of you are likely to be surprised, the sex drive has been ridiculous.
Until Next Time,