It’s Pride Month, So I’m finally getting around to posting your AMA questions

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I know everyone’s probably thinking: what’s Tyler been up to and where’s his update to the AMA for TDOV? Ok – no one’s been thinking any of that. So part of my new year’s resolution this year was to find more ways to be more visible and to help my community and as part of doing so, I’ve been a little less present here. I’ve joined the board of directors for Point of Pride, which as been everything I hoped for and more.

But I did want to circle back to some of the questions I got on TDOV, my answers and whatnot, some of which produced some interesting and thought-provoking chatter on my Facebook and gave me a bit to continue to think about in the future.

Continue reading It’s Pride Month, So I’m finally getting around to posting your AMA questions

Transgender Day of Visibility 2017

Today, March 31st, is Transgender Day of Visibility. And more than any other year, I feel like my willingness and ability to be visible is particularly important. In the wake of many of the current administration’s changes – rescinding orders protecting LGBT people from employment discrimination, appointments that have long histories of discrimination against ANY minorities, bathroom bills popping up like flowers this spring…and the rumors. And I know you can’t quite put stock in rumors, but regardless of that, they’re on everyone in the community’s radar – and what scares me most about that is that the kids are listening.

Every LGBT-oriented suicide hotline is reporting increased calls since the election, and spikes with each new policy or appointment that marginalizes our community. EIGHT trans people have been killed so far in 2017. Most of them trans women of color. And that’s just the reported ones. How many are being swept aside because they were closeted, or even just out right misreported by police and media.

So for those of us fortunate enough to be able to be visible, we have an obligation to those who can’t to stand up for us all. I’ve said many times that the root of hate will always be ignorance and the cure for ignorance is education. Most people have either never met a trans person, or don’t know that they have.

So as I’ve done in years past, I’m hosting a bit of an “Ask Me Anything” session. Nothing is “rude”. Nothing is “off limits”. Nothing is “too far”. Ask me however you want – email, Facebook, Twitter, my blog, call me, text me, use this. Feel free to share.

And when it’s all said and done, I’ll post all the questions, and answers anonymously here for people to see.

Til Next Time,

Tyler

 

03/31/2017 – Rocking my #PointOfPrideTDOV shirt.

 

 

Pre-T – 02/2015 – See below for present-day comparison

 

 

03/30/2017 – 2 years of T and a lot of gym time.

 

 

Yes – I took a gym selfie. 03/30/2017

 

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Coolest mother in law ever – being an ally for trans rights.
My wife – being supportive as ever. #Ally
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The ever-so-lovely Kelli – another ally

#TransForTheHolidays: Last Call for 2016

Wow. So first, what a response. We were lucky enough to be shared by Point of Pride and our response quadrupled in a few hours. We are coming up on the deadline to have items shipped to arrive by Christmas 2016. While this isn’t strictly a Christmas program, we are hoping to have the packs mailed by 12/21/2016 to have them at people’s doorsteps by Christmas. That being said, let me proceed with the area-specific updates.

Donate: The Amazon Wishlist is still up and I broke down and set up a PayPal Account to help offset shipping costs. I’m working on some updates to it to reflect better what we have and what we’re still looking for. Gift cards would be awesome at this point. If you’d like, you can email e-gift cards to TransForTheHolidays@gmail.com. If your donation doesn’t make it in time to get into a 2016 gift pack, don’t worry: it will NOT go to waste. Leftovers and late arrivals will be stored for 2017, or some possible other projects #TransForTheHolidays hopes to do in 2017. Early in the year, we’re going to be working on becoming an official non-profit organization and expanding our base. So don’t you worry. We will be putting everything to good use.

Ask For Help: The survey is still up! Please have your responses in by the end of this week so we can have you a pack by Christmas. We’ll be keeping the survey open through the end of the year, then closing it to focus on coming back even stronger in 2017. We’ve been getting a lot of requests for binders and packers. I’m still looking for resources for people in the packer department, but if you’re looking for a binder, head over to Point of Pride‘s binder give away program and get yourself on their waiting list. How long it takes depends on demand and sizing, since they’re donation based. But they’ll help you as fast as they can.

Signal Boost: Keep sharing. Keep using #TransForTheHolidays. Don’t forget to make the post public so everyone can see it. Finally, follow our new Facebook Page for ongoing updates about 2017 plans and documentation of our shenanigans in kicking off a non-profit. It’s a little barebones right now, but thanks to a friend far artsier than I, we will soon have a totally kickass logo. And we’ll post pictures of the care packs going together.

Next update will include pictures of the mayhem that is Melissa and I packing boxes for shipment. We forgot the post office closes early on Satuday, so we didn’t pick up boxes today, but we have 8 out of 27 packs ready to roll and another 5-7 just waiting on an item or two.

Until next time, much love!
Tyler

Community Support Project: #TransForTheHolidays

As many of you know, the holidays are a tough time for trans people. For some it means going home to a family that doesn’t respect their names or pronouns, and for many, it means not having a home to go home to. The NTCE  estimates that as many as 20% of trans people have experienced homelessness at some point in their lives, but this year, I’m hoping to ease that burden, at least a little, for some people. That’s why I’m starting this project. I don’t know how successful it will be, but I’m hoping to get at least a little support and help out at least a person or two.

#TransForTheHolidays hopes to send out some care packages to homeless, couch surfing, closeted, in a shelter, or other trans people that might not be looking forward to the holidays. What I need is your help. I don’t personally know any trans people in these sorts of situations, so here’s what you can do:

Donate: It’s going to be difficult for me to accept monetary donations, but if the demand is high enough I’ll set up a pay pal or something. The easiest way would be to purchase something off the Amazon Wish List. Once received, I’ll either use the supplies to assemble care packages or forward restaurant gift cards to people that might not otherwise know where their next meal is coming from. I’ll even let you know exactly how I used your donation, if you’d like. Email Address: Trans For the Holidays <transfortheholidays@gmail.com>. I was careful to select products from companies with a history of LGBT inclusion, especially Procter & Gamble, the parent company behind Secret.

 

Signal Boost: Sometimes people can’t afford to spend money. I get that, so help me get the word out. Use #TransForTheHolidays to get the word out. Sign someone up that may be afraid to ask for help (packages will be discreet so as to not out someone) – sign up yourself and we’ll send you one. Sometimes it’s just nice to know someone’s thinking of you.

 

Ask for Help: If you need help, just sign up using this form. Like I noted above, the packages will be discreet and your address, email address and phone number will not be used for anything but sending you a care package. The phone number is only required if you’re going to pick up your package from a post office and we’ll get something out to you – no judgement, no questions.

All of this information has been permanently posted as a page on my blog as well: #TransForTheHolidays

Happy Holidays and Much Love,

Tyler
Edit: after some feedback from the community, I took out the send a package option for the time being. There’s no sure fire way to verify that volunteers for this will be discreet in their mailings. If there’s a way I can bring this back safer for the recipients, I will.

Document Amendments: Consular Report of Birth Abroad

As many of you know from previous posts, I’m an army brat. So I don’t have a state-issued birth certificate; I have a Consular Report of Birth Abroad (FS-545 or FS-240, depending on your birthdate). In the post-election hubbub, it’s given me the impetus to update my documents and I figured I’d post it here to help you guys out if you’re in a similar situation, including the wording I’m using for my affidavit.

If you only have the FS-545, you’ll also need a signed, notarized affidavit stating that the FS-240 form is not in your possession.

Instructions for replacing or amending a consular certificate of birth abroad are listed on the Department of State’s WebsiteContinue reading Document Amendments: Consular Report of Birth Abroad

Three Weeks Since Top Surgery

Today marks just over 3 weeks since top surgery. I had the sutures and drains out after about a week. I was having some issues with fluid build up in the right side, which isn’t dangerous from a health stand point, but definitely detrimental from a results stand point. In total, Dr. Leis drained about 100mL of fluid from the right side over about a week. Eventually he injected the right side with a really potent steroid and swished it around and drained it to help discourage the swelling and that seems to have done the trick.

Continue reading Three Weeks Since Top Surgery

Fridays from The Men’s Room – 01/29/2016

Monday – There were like 10 people here. Maybe it has to do with the 30″ of snow outside. Most of the conversation was small talk about whether or not we all got dug out of the snow. Something that continues to surprise me is how much more general small talk goes on in the men’s room than ever did in the women’s room. Women are very much get in, get out. I don’t really remember ever hearing women talking in the locker room.

Tuesday – I came at an odd time because I had my preop (!) appointment this morning. There were only a hand full of people there. This time I was the guy that was caught singing embarrassingly (One Direction) in the locker room. Fortunately this didn’t even get me as much as a sideways glance.

Thursday – “Can’t Touch This”. Seriously the men’s room is basically an underwear-clad singing montage. The guys sing way more than the girls even talked.

Friday – Not 100% certain if it’s depression or exhaustion kicking in, but my body told me I needed to skip today, so I did.